As far back as I can remember, I’ve had a big love for life. My mama called me fearless. I would be the first one to stand in line for the crazy roller coaster right after it stopped working, the one to jump off bridges and 50 ft cliffs. I’ve always wanted to live my life to the fullest, non stop fun and adventure.
When my life crashed several years ago and I hit rock bottom, God moved me to NC. Here He began in me the painful healing process. And early on made my greater calling very clear to me. He began to reveal that my identity has been in people. Being popular, fun and well liked felt good but He knew it was shaky.
He took me through a season of “Jesus + Nothing”. He showed me that far too many Christians have Jesus on a shelf along with other idols and identities. Mine was, “I love you Jesus, just don’t take my people”. He responded with, “Really? How about I move you across the country, with no popularity, very few friends and no family. Your identity needs to be reshaped to be in me alone. I am doing a new thing in you.”
That began what is now 6 years of God completing recreating me to where I don’t even identify with who I once was. Now I seek His kingdom before my own and obey when it’s uncomfortable. The way I act, react, think it’s all completing changed and still changing.
It’s only possible because I chose purpose over pleasure.
What’s crazy is that even though I’m in the most difficult season of my life and greatly miss my people, I have much more peace, joy and deeper connections than ever before. It’s because it comes from Him alone. If someone offends, walks away or rejects me it doesn’t cause me to limp.
When you are willing to sacrifice, to be obedient no matter the cost, then peace, favor and protection is your constant companion.
I heard something yesterday while at a girls beach trip, that I haven’t heard in quite some time. Three women at separate times during the day came up telling me, “I’m so glad you’re here, you brought the sunshine.” “You’re the life of the party. I love your heart for people.” You see, God has always meant for me to be this fun, encouraging woman. He just had to get me to a place where I can be grateful for a kind word instead of filled. But if people don’t affirm then I’m ok because He’s my identity. He’s my rock.
For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.” – Jeremiah 29:11-13
Let’s be a people that seek why we are on this earth. I guarantee you it’s not to be rich, famous and comfortable.